ACLR 007: Re-examining Sex and Marriage with Fledgling Madame, Holley Shepard
After years of monogamy, what does it look like to stop and reveal your secret sexual desires…to your spouse? Is an open marriage a happier marriage? What rules and boundaries must you establish to make non-monogamy work? This week we explore sex with the swervy Fledgling Madame, Holley Shepard.
“Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.” Mae West
Who is Holley Shepard?
The Fledgling Madame
Promoter of safe, fun, and intentional sexual exploration through writing, counseling, and special events.
Co-owner of Sanctuary, Portland Oregon’s innovative and inclusive LGBTQ and Alternative Lifestyle sex positive night club and event venue.
Swervy ethical non-monogamist, wife, mother, friend, skier, reader, and damn fine neighbor.
What will you learn?
Differences between consensual non-monogamy, swing, kink, and poly.
The number one thing Holley has learned about what makes great sex.
Why compersion is such a turn-on.
What happens at a sex club versus a sex positive club.
Curious questions.
After nearly two decades of monogamy, what happens when you open yourself up to just the idea of an open marriage…and then take the plunge?
Do you have sex in front of each other? How do you prioritize marriage with other actors in the mix?
What are your most important rules and boundaries? What rules are easiest to break?
What has surprised you most about your polyamorous life?
Links and resources:
The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love by Janet W. Hardy
More Than Two: A Practice Guide to Ethical Polyamory by Franklin Veaux
Mating In Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel
Savage Lovecast podcast by Dan Savage
The Game by Neil Strauss
The Truth: An Uncomfortable Book About Relationships by Neil Strauss
Stephanie Coontz, world’s leading marriage historian
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Special thanks to Holley for joining me this week. Until next time!